What IS a "Bad day"?

It's about perspective! We've all had days where it seems all we do is go from bad to worse. Mom's have days where we feel that maybe we haven't accomplished what we wanted to, in our home, with our children, in our relationships and in our schooling. IS that what makes a bad day?

I've had days where I felt I hadn't done anything right. I was sure my kids were better off in the care of someone else, this usually passes with a nap and some chocolate. Still, we are under alot of pressure to succeed with our children. We're taught to think of ourselves in terms of how well others around us, under our care, are doing. Did Jr. finish well in school? Did our daughter marry well? Did our sons find jobs? Are they lazy? We often gauge our success by the success or failure of our children. Is this the right perspective?

One question that always plaques my mind, was I prepared to raise, educate and train these children. I believe the answer is yes. Not because my parents educated me, for they did not. My parents were not even the ones who cared for me in most of my formative years. So... would you ask a one legged man to teach you to ride a bike?

What is his perspective? I would assume, my bad days ... are nothing compared to this day. How did he measure success? If the child does not learn to ride today, is it because he has one leg? Is it because the teacher was not prepared? Is it because he did not care enough?

I would think those things unfair, when applied to this situation. Yet, I'm that hard on myself.

Maybe I don't have many bad days after all. Maybe I just have the wrong perspective.

Measure success by where you were last year at this time. Measure the little things. Measure with grace for yourself and for the others in your life. Hmm guess I need to practice that a little more often. My life is good, I don't have the challenges many others have. I'm having a good day.

Choosing Directions

Well it's time to decide what to do for next year already. I feel sure I'm less worried about Homeschooling High School than I was when she was in grade 3. Is it just me? Or does everyone Homeschooler feel there's some special pressure that is supposed to accompany the High School years? I've decided, it's just another year of schooling in our home. Our direction is to find the area most promising, an area of interest, a possible career. We're going to keep reading good quality books. We're comfortable with our Math and Science choices and so we're almost done making the decisions for this next year.

I can't tell you how freeing it is to have the decisions made.

Why do we overwhelm ourselves so often about the future? Worry about every number, grade or subject? Why do we look for things to fret about?

What a great privilege and honor to school our teens at home. I, for one, am happy we've decided to go the less hoop-jumping route and keep doing what we've been doing all along.

Lighting Up

Have you ever had the joy of a glow stick?

When you get them.. they're straight, stiff and perfect. They also don't do much... maybe you could use if for a back scratcher.

To make the glow stick fun ... it has to be flexible.

You have to bend it ... alot. Breaking the glass inside to release the chemicals that make it light up, means bending and shaking... loads of fun.

Now you can make all kinds of things with your glow stick... let your imagination fly.

I realized... schooling my kids is like that. I get them all straight and perfect ... but they don't have much to offer. Schooling takes bending, shaking and a little breaking... then they light up.

All kinds of possibilities for their future come clear to them. I see their imagination, creativity and understanding come to light.

Plus.. they're way more fun.

Let them glow!!!

Learning from the every day

Things I learned from a Chop Saw
I have this way of talking with God about life.. he talks to me through everyday work and mostly my kids. I'm often surprised how much I learn from just thinking about life as an item or an event. Here's what I learned from the chop saw and barnwood:

1. Always be aware of what your hands are doing
2. Often you have to sacrifice something good to get rid of the rotten bits.
3. When you cut the rotten bits out of your life, you end up with a pile of things you got to get rid of, there's always the question of how?
4. People often feel the need to stop, watch and comment when you're trying to rid yourself of rot.
5. People have various opinions about what is worth saving and what is just not worth the effort.
6. Saving money usually takes alot of work
7. Our bodies do best when we work them, and fall apart when we don't.
8. If you don't plug in, it doesn't work very well.
9. What a speck in your eye feels like.. and you'd never get to the point of a log...

What am I worth?

Maybe it's the cold grey skies, or the tax guy telling me I'm not worth anything, or that small voice that sometimes tells me the lie that if I stay at home with my children and don't earn money... somehow my worth is less. It's popular to be labeled by what you're "worth"... especially when you're preparing the taxes.

I'm past 40 and this often brings me to reflect on how I'm doing in my life. So what am I worth? I stay at home with my 3 kids, I teach them basics of life and their education comes from me. How does that add up to worth?


I can't imagine a better job, I can imagine better pay! These days are paid in wet, sloppy kisses, millions of drawings of castles and pirates, a warm, small hand slipped in mine, nature walks, complete exposure to real life and a dose of bodialy function jokes. It's pretty good pay till the tax forms need to be filled out.

I'm worth more than my "bottom line", thank God for that. I am investing in my children's future. I'm giving quality and quantity time. I can see the light in their eyes as they finally understand a concept and I was part of that. I teach them about nature, it's benefits, to respect it and all the lessons it holds for all who take time to look. I am the stable, foundational force that my family grows on... I am worth... alot.

It may seem elementary but ... somedays moms who stay at home .. we forget what we are worth ... so I'm taking time out from a mid life crisis to remind myself. My children's lives, my husband's life would be completely different (and I think lacking) with out me.. that's my worth.

At Home: Everyone is learning.

Our journey in Home Education has been one of many changes, many tears, many laughs and many discoveries. I wouldn't change it for anything. Somedays I feel like we're "Swiss Family Robinson" and we have to re-invent everything. Somedays I feel like we're at the zoo and everyone is a little wild, and waiting to be fed. Somedays I'm sure I've birthed the next Einstien and someday the world will thank me. Most days, I'm just mom .. the one everyone needs in order to function. Somedays... I want to change my name to Dad ... since he doesn't get interupted as often.

The amazing thing is that I am the one who has learned so much. Oh, they learn too but I have learned to develop my own character and education as I've prepped and taught my kids. The light of understanding is not just for those who require the knowledge to prepare them for life, but it is also for us who... realize education never was about the teacher... it's about taking responsiblity to love the process of learning. Education never ends.

Recently my son asked "what do beggers do with our arms? Who wants a bloody stump?" I felt that strange buzzing in my head when I'm really trying to get on the same frequency as this child's thinking ... but no .. nothing. Somewhere I'd lost the connection.

"What ARE we talking about?"

"You know, what do they do with the arms? When they say 'Arms for the poor'?"

ohhhhhh

This was followed by a discussion about a new part of his vocabulary; alms.

When did I have the time to wonder?
When did I sit in silence and consider such weighty matters?

There is nothing like a child to open our world to new horizions...
these are the days of learning
these are the days when I realize my educaiton lacked
at no fault of my teachers
for my teachers are my children
my husband
my trials
my garden
my life at home.